A Story of Before and After
Hello Reclaimers!
If you've been with me for a while, you know that one of the most important things that I teach is pausing to celebrate how far we've come. And today, I just want to share a little bit more about my own story of how far I've come since opening up the Reclaim Your Space community.
Here's the thing:
The work that we're doing is so very tangible, there's work in our physical space, there are choices that we get to make. We get to put our hands on objects and move them and clear physical space. We get to pick up a paintbrush, or a broom, or a rag and tend to our physical space. We get to be very very mindful and thoughtful about how we communicate what we want for our physical space.
That is the crux of this work.
But it's not the piece that excites me the most.
The piece that excites me the most is that when we start doing this work, when we start building these muscles in our physical space, there is a ripple effect into almost every other area of our life that is immensely powerful. It is transformation.
The number of people who've already told me that the work they're doing in Reclaim Your Space, over the course of even a just few days, has been life changing blows me away. Every time!
I am honored to be your guide on this process and like I said, I am also doing this work myself. Some of you might remember that, about six weeks ago, I stepped into a new home. I took a step out of my marriage and my family's home to create a space where I could really thrive.
And in doing so, everything has changed.
So I want to tell you a little story: my before and after story.
Before launching Reclaim Your Space just three months ago, I was living with my husband and kids. I was commuting each day to our Houseplay Renovations office. I was running the company, except that it was shut down. I was not sure what I was meant to create in the world, but I had a sense that it was something new. I was lonely. I missed hugs and the smell of humans. I wanted to expand my practice of music. I wanted to immerse myself in more beauty and creative expression. I wanted for a lot. I woke up stressed and anxious almost every day.
And now...I live in a home with three people, two dogs, two pianos, a kitten on the way, a magical front porch with the perfect patch of grass and clover to sink my feet into. I spend my time most days writing, creating, playing, just being, conversing, hugging, loving, swimming, walking, transforming, healing. I enjoy quality time with my kids throughout each week. I've transitioned out of running Houseplay Renovations steadily. I've created a new community and clients who I love. I've leaned into receiving abundance with less effort than ever before. I'm loving life again. I'm filled up. I feel more peace, serenity, and ease in my body than I can remember ever feeling before.
How did this happen? How did I create this?
It's both simpler and more immense than you might imagine.
It took a lot of courage. It took a lot of support. I dove into a community of transformational leaders over a year ago and those relationships sustain me and spark me onwards towards creating the life that I truly want. We celebrate each other’s wins and I always have them there, cheering me on.
It also took a series of very small, tangible steps: one foot in front of the other.
One very tiny moment of choice after the other.
When I moved into my new space, I was so weary. I thought, ‘Yeah. The walls are kind of messed up and I don't love the ceiling paint situation. Everything's a little dingy and dirty. My room hasn't been very well maintained. But I don't care. I just need to get there.’
And then I paused and I made a different choice.
I remembered, ‘I am teaching and guiding people about reclaiming their spaces. I get to do it for me too.’
So the first day, I just decided I'm going to clean my room before I move any of my things. And so I spent a few hours. And it was steady, and it was hard. There was so much resistance coming up, but I took a spray bottle and paper towel, and went around the perimeter of the room and I cleaned the floor and the baseboard moldings and the window trim until everything was a little bit more sparkly.
And then I thought, ‘Actually, maybe I do want to pick my own paint color for the walls and freshen up the ceiling.’
And so with the support of my brother, we laid out the dust sheets on the floor. We poured the paint, got out brushes and the rollers. and we painted the walls and the ceiling and the trim. It took a few days.
My plan had been to gather leftovers from my family’s house and just fill up my room with the stuff that they don't need there.
And then I paused and I thought, ‘Actually, I teach people to fill their spaces with objects that bring them joy, things that they love, things that have the energy of freedom.’
And so, I got courageous and for the first time since the coronavirus pandemic reached New York, I put on a mask and I took myself to the store and I spent an hour just picking up objects that brought me joy, when I looked at them, when I touched them, when I held them up to my skin, when I breathed them in.
When I faced the daunting task of packing up my things and bringing them here, I very gently tended to my body and my spirit. I've got support from dear friends over the phone, cheering me on. And I spent a couple hours packing up my clothes and my books, my art. And in two trips I drove it over to my new space.
After a little while of living here and loving it, I realized, ‘I just want to be here in this space all the time. I don't want to drive to the office anymore.’
And so I summoned a lot of courage to both step out, and also to ask for support. A friend and I drove to the Houseplay office. I gathered my laptop and my art supplies and anything else that I needed and I brought them here.
For a few weeks my clothes lived in suitcases in the corner of my room. And, over time, as I built up my strength I thought, ‘Okay, it's time for a dresser.’ So I took one step after another... searching on Facebook marketplace, found a dresser, asked a friend to join me, drove across the river to Westchester, picked up my dresser, brought it back, filled it with my clothes, set my altar up on top.
My room has come together, step by step, piece by piece. And it continues. I have a list of all the other pieces that still get to come in here to make this space complete.
Today I'm celebrating how far I've come and I'm celebrating how far each of you has come in this time, doing this work along with me.
Remember that freedom is even just one step in a new direction. And I'm honored to be your guide as you continue to reclaim your space, as you take back sovereignty to trust yourself, to tune into your desire, to build those muscles of consistency, in tending and maintaining the space that you create.
Here’s to your reclamation! Here’s to your freedom!
Much love,
Tam
